Famous couples having sex with each other, a young actress touching her breasts, and most recently, a veteran singer masturbating on a video call. In less than a month, these video ‘scandals’ have made their rounds in social media, with Filipinos becoming more and more ruthless in their judgments of those involved.
But, is there really something wrong with lovers having a ball in the bedroom, a young woman exploring her body, and an elderly engaging in what seemed like an act of self gratification? Nothing. Though a lot of people may deem these acts as inappropriate, they’re actually not. They’re normal expressions of our sexual selves which should be celebrated, not condemned.
The problem with us Filipinos is that we’re too quick to judge. We thrive in seeing others make mistakes – especially those who we see have better lives than we do, such as celebrities. Add that to the belief that sex is dirty and immoral, and voila, we have the perfect recipe for persecution. We like throwing stones at people whom we think are better than us, hoping that they would fall down to the ground and be like us. Yes, we’re that inggetera by nature.
The real perpetrators here are not those who were filmed enjoying sex, but those who leaked them and violated the privacy of these celebrities. And we, as spectators, watchers, and sharers of the videos are accessories to the crime. Through watching these videos and making them viral and trending, we are violating another person’s most private and intimate possession. Not only that, we don’t realize it, but in the act of watching these videos, we become voyeurs. Mamboboso. And we like it. Filipinos are the number one porn watchers after all. So it’s not surprising that if a local celebrity is seen having sex on video, we watch it, we talk about it, we persecute, we make a big deal out of it. Not only are we natural inggeteras, we’re also natural mambobosos. Think about it.
So what if they’re having sex? So what if she’s touching herself? So what if he’s old and still know how to have fun online? It shouldn’t be a big deal. They’re just enjoying themselves, as much as you are enjoying yourself while watching their videos. The only difference is, they’re not doing anything wrong, but you are.
Hence, next time you encounter a sex scandal going around the cyberspace, best to respect these people’s privacies and not to share it. And if you don’t want to be seen as an envious voyeur, stop judging and keep your eyes on your own business.
Rica Cruz is a Licensed Psychologist, Sex and Relationships Therapist, Sex Educator and a faculty member of the Department of Psychology at the Ateneo de Manila University. She opines that sexual empowerment for Filipinos is sexier than sex. You can catch more of her every Thursday at Boys’ Night Out, Magic 89.9 and follow her at facebook.com/TheSexyMind and @_ricacruz on Twitter and Instagram
Illustration by Madel Crudo
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